Walking In Faith

FAITH: BELIEF IN GOD OR IN THE DOCTRINES OR TEACHING OF RELIGION

To say that my faith has been tested this summer would be a complete and total understatement. It seems as though whenever we (Mr. Grumps & I) get over one hurdle another hurdle comes along that makes me think damn I thought that last hurdle was big, this one’s even bigger. But I know that trouble doesn’t last always and so I walk in faith.

Some mornings I feel like I just don’t have it in me to face the day. But I know that someone somewhere wasn’t blessed enough to wake up. And so I say my prayers, I get up and I walk in faith.

I find myself asking “why us Lord”. But I know that HE must be working on something greater and so I say thy will be done and I walk in faith.

Sometimes I catch myself worrying. But I know that I can’t pray AND worry. And so I cast my worries aside and I walk in faith.

Walking in faith is not easy to do especially when the majority of us feel like we have control over or can control everything that goes on. But like my granny always tells me “If God brought you to it then He will bring you through it”. And so I continue to walk in faith.

I hope that someone reads this and is reminded of how almighty the Lord is and walks in faith.

No Worries…..God’s got this!

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This Week in Mommyhood: Caring is for the birds!

I’m treading in very unfamiliar territory these days and it’s so uncomfortable. I’ve never really been too keen on caring what people had to say about me or how I lived my life, as long as I knew I was doing the best that I could, that I was making decisions that I was okay with, that I wasn’t hurting anyone and I didn’t disgrace my parental units too much or too often I was good. I sent my mother into her fair share of panic attacks but I’ll just chock those up to growing pains. I didn’t even bat an eye when my granny told me I was going to hell for having an abundance of tattoos and for “living in sin”, I actually laughed. So besides a small share of times I’ve never really been affected by people’s opinion of me…..

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That is until I became a mom. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not walking around seeking approval from the whole free world but now I am deeply affected by things that my support system says and thinks in regards to me being a mom. Which is so ridiculously stupid and annoying, I don’t like this feeling one bit. Because of these new “unwanted” feelings I’ve been experiencing I allowed something that a close family member said make me so angry that I completely lost my cool. And usually I’m the cool even-tempered one in the room. Well until shit hits the fan but that’s another story for another time lol. Babygirl’s hair was commented on by a family member and I went from 0-300 REAL QUICK! That’s some shit you just don’t do…EVER! I’ve gotten fired up about people going out of their way to say something about Gabby Douglas’ hair instead of the greatness that she achieved and when that stupid petition was posted online for Jay & Bey to do something with Blue Ivy’s hair so I think it’s was a given that when the comment was made about Babygirl’s hair I lost my shit. The comment was made about 3 weeks ago and I still haven’t made my way back down to 0.

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This is when it gets annoying if it were said about me cooler heads would have prevailed I’d have a super snappy comeback, laugh and dismiss you just like that. But you say something about my child and the hot head in me was unleashed and all my God given common sense just flew out the damn window. I’m aware that I have absolutely no control over the things that come out of people’s mouth and I have all the control in the world over my reactions and this is something I try to live by on a daily basis but when you throw being a mom and having something said about my kid into the mix it’s totally unconquered territory for me. Which is where the being uncomfortable and annoyed comes in, it’s like I know the numbers and I know the equations I just can’t apply the math. Ugh! I am absolutely positively unapologetic about my lost shit nor am I in any rush to find it as I’m totally into nipping in the bud-ness but I am also very aware that I can’t go around blowing fuses every single time something like this happens (I don’t possess enough fuses for that). The differentiation of what’s worth a fuse and what isn’t and developing thick mommy skin is going to be a task that will require the constant hand of Jesus upon me at all times, because right about now I’m feeling like a new born baby out in these streets, but I’m ready to do the work! And so this is yet another learning experience in the magical world of mommyhood. Oy vey!

No worries…I got this!

I’m Obsessed With

Creating healthy eating habits is a motherf**ker! No matter how good you think you’re doing trust me there are a thousand things you’re doing wrong. I honestly thought that I was a pretty good eater, I love fruits and veggies and I don’t eat alot of junk (except that time of the month) but there were so many other things I didn’t take into account like the times that I eat, the times I do not, the amount that I eat when I do eat etc etc. So I’m trying to fix one thing at a time. And man is it is a constant struggle. I love the salt and the crunch of potato chips but there’s no need to tell you how bad those are for you. So I replaced them with Roasted Seaweed:

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I guess it’s sort of an acquired taste but I love sushi so roasted seaweed is good to me, they come in different flavors but I’m partial to the olive oil and sea salt ones. It’s some of the salt of the potato chips and the initial crunchiness until it kind of melts once it’s in your mouth. The best part is it’s high in protein and it’s about 30-60 calories per pack (depending on the brand). For me it’s a start on my journey to healthier eating.

Have you tried roasted seaweed? Do you love or hate it?

I’m Obsessed With…

I’m obsessed with people’s obsession with all things pumpkin and pumpkin spiced.

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It seems like as soon as fall or the threat of fall comes around all the pumpkin spiced fiends come out.   Go on ahead and add the image of pumpkin spiced so and so’s to the ever so picturesque red, orange and yellow leaves on the ground, the need for a chunky sweaters, warm soups and brisk air when thinking of fall.  The pumpkin has totally gone from the Halloween mascot to a way of life.   I kind of want to blame Starbucks for starting this frenzy with their pumpkin spiced latte and then Dunkin Donuts pumpkin spiced doughnut holes, pumpkin ale, pumpkin spiced cronuts, pumpkin spiced lip balm, pumpkin spiced body lotion, Red Robin even has pumpkin spiced milk shakes.   I drew the damned line last week when my skirt was likened to pumpkin spice. I don’t get it but you better believe that I’m gonna get to the bottom of why everyone loses their gotdamn mind when September rolls around.

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And while we’re on the subject I wonder have any of these people even tasted a real live pumpkin because if so they wouldn’t be going cuckoo for pumpkin spiced coco puffs, it’s fugging disgusting.  And what in sam hill is pumpkin spice anyway.  Is that some kind of seasoning they sprinkle on pumpkins to make it not taste like a$$ and if so you mean to tell me that the whole world is obsessed with a seasoning?!!!  Really?!

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I overheard a lady while waiting in Starbucks say “I’m just not myself if I don’t have my psl” (psl being pumpkin spiced latte for all you normal non pumpkin spiced obsessed people of the world).  Thank the lort that this craze only lasts for about 2 months or so because if I had to endure the rest of the year feeling like the only human in a pumpkin spiced zombie infested planet it would not be a good thing.  So if you are reading this and you are one of said pumpkin spiced heads I need you to do 2 or 2 things:

1. Tell me why-e (backstreet boys “I Want It That Way” voice)

2. Snap the hell out of it!!!!!!!!

Let’s get it together people.  We can’t continue to live Fall this way!

(disclaimer: this post is all in fun and is a totally judgement free-ish zone)

 

No Pumpkin Spiced Worries….I’ve Got This!

 

 

 

Back on Track

In one of my last non jam of the week posts Mommy Checklist I mentioned my overwhelming feeling of being pressed for time.  You name it I’m late for it or don’t have time for it.

After a lifetime of being a serial self beater upper it hit me like a mack truck that beating myself up about things doesn’t make it go away, it’s still there and now it hurts.  So I’ve been making a conscious effort to make time Point. Blank. Period.  I’m still experiencing my fair share of epic fails yet feeling a little less stressed and seeing a little difference in my life/running around like a chicken with my head cut off, balance.  Something tells me it takes close to a lifetime to master this thingee they call time management.   Among exercise, mandatory playtime with babygirl and getting my brows waxed, I’m making blogging a non negotiable.

So cheers to me being back on track.

That was my long-winded way of apologizing and thanking you for sticking with me during this rut!  You guys are the best.

No worries…I got this!

 

I’m A Drag!

I’ve been binge watching RuPaul’s Drag Race (because who doesn’t love a reality competition show) and believe it or not it’s way educational. And although I feel more well rounded as a human being I think I may be in drag overdrive, here’s why:

1)
coutouring

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If you would have asked me a month ago I would have told you these lady boys were pre-gaming for a trip to the circus but I now know that this is called contouring and it is the only way in which to be truly beat!

2)
5 words: YOU BETTA CINCH THAT WAIST!
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To hell with being comfortable I’ve been rocking my waist cincher so that when I leave my house my waist is cinched to the hernia gawds hunty!

3)
I told my cousin she was FISHY and she got mad at me! I had to explain to her that in the drag world fishy is a compliment. It means you are super fierce and super feminine. Apparently she doesn’t get out much!

4)
While preparing for my upcoming vacation and trying on outfits I couldn’t stop serving my granny realness as she so graciously photographed each look. ie. “with this look I am serving MILF realness” “I am giving you toned legged realness” “grecian goodness realness”. After asking me what the hell I was talking about a couple of times she just told me to shut up and pose for the picture.

As fun and colorful as “living” in the drag world has been it’s not as much fun when you’re the only one in your circle who lives there. So my people need to get it together and get on to this drag race realness so that they can be “sickening” like me.

And that’s all I have to say….as I sashay away!

Sh*t Babygirl Says…

Conversations with babygirl have been way more interesting now that they aren’t one-sided and by interesting I mean most of the time I’m left open-mouthed and confused faced. I’m baffled by babies’ comedic timing and knowing when to use certain phrases. In the last couple of weeks babygirl has dropped some of these precious jewels:

Just this morning as she sat and ate her silver dollar sized pancakes like a big girl:
Me: Pay attention when you’re eating don’t make a mess
BG: Ok don’t worry mommy, I got it!
(well excuse the hell out of me)

Last night as she devoured a salad that was intended for me, I tried to make a learning game out of it and asked her the name of each vegetable she practically stole from my mouth:
Me: What’s that?
BG: Egg
Me: Very good
Me: What’s that
BG: Apple
Me: No that’s a tomato
BG: mumble jumble
Me: No say Toe
BG: Toe
Me: May
BG: May
Me: Toe
BG: Toe
Me: Tomato
BG: Cameltoe

A week or so ago, before leaving for work after applying my lip balm and putting it away I extend it to her because I know how much she loves putting chap stick and lip balm on. Not realizing she had a hand full of toys:
BG: One second mommy (as she holds up the one second finger)

If these are the type of conversations I’m having at only 2 years old I can only imagine how much better (hilarious) it is going to get. Pray for me ya’ll.

No worries…..she got it!